On what are you basing this confidence of yours?

On what are you basing this confidence of yours? (Isaiah 36:4) It is a really interesting question for me. In the context, it wasn’t actually just a question. The field commander of Assyria was trying to discourage the people of Jerusalem and he continued, “Do not let Hezekiah persuade you to trust in the Lord when he says, ‘The Lord will surely deliver us; this city will not be given into the hand of the king of Assyria’” and so on. It is really interesting, also how the people of Jerusalem reacted to it. Well, you can just read it anyway.

“On what are you basing this confidence of yours?” It was a question to myself. In the question, it was assumed that the person -- in this case, me -- has confidence. Do I have it? Yes, I do.

I would lie if I say that I’m not nervous. It’s about my exam. Not just any exam, but the final exam of my pre-clinic. I would lie if I say I didn’t worry. My brain was sending me warning-signals of its overloaded capacity. I would lie if I say I wasn’t afraid because there were nights where I slept with my pillow wet of tears.

But the answer is still yes. My confidence is based on Christ and His faithfulness. I'm sure, that He who took me to this place will take me through it too. I had a lot of uncertainties behind me. There was a time where I wasn’t here at all, where I didn’t even think of this exam, but only if I could be accepted in this study. Yet here I am now. So, no, I don’t want to believe those lies in my mind that I haven’t done enough and given all my best. No, not today.

It was two years of the faithfulness of God. It wasn’t just two years, of course not. God has been faithful all my days. But these two years (or actually 4 years since I left my hometown), have been such an amazing journey. You may believe it, you may not, but He has provided all that I need and made all impossibles possible.

“This is my confidence: You’ve never failed me yet.”

This part of the song "Do It Again" from Elevation Worship can represent my answer best. At some points in my life, I failed and I thought that God has failed me. But no, now at this point, I can say that all that He has given me, has surpassed my expectations and He has never failed me yet.

Sometimes, there is a lie that craps my mind, that He may be faithful then but not for now. But I know better. There were some moments where I just had the same thought, and in the end, He was just as faithful as before, as He is since the first time. The song from Vertical Worship "Faithful now" couldn't express it better. (You may quickly realize that worship is just how I fight. This is how I fight my battle, cause my weapon is my melody. Yes, even this was a part of a song from Upperroom, haha.)

"Cause You make mountains move, You make giants fall.

And You use songs of praise to shake prison walls

And I will speak to my fear, I will preach to my doubt,

that You were faithful then, You'll be faithful now"

God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does He promise and not fulfill? (Numbers 23:19) In this I have confidence. Not only because it is written on the Bible, but because I myself have experienced it. I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good, so why would I worry? This is what I'm basing this confidence of mine.

“I walked with Jesus for enough yesterdays to trust Him with all my tomorrows.” - Craig Groeschel